so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
