My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
