I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
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