yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize