No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
