I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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