Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
