you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
