Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
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