doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
