i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
