Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize
