I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
