So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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