Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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