I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
