I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize