it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
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