where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
We're too hungover to prance.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
