i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
