I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Randomize
