This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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