I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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