If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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