how can u be prego again
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
it's like heaven, but drunker
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
