i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
