so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Randomize