I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
So. Much. Porn.
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