And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
