I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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