I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
should my penis look like a turkey
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
