so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
