She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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