The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
They are going to name an STD after you.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
