you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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