She said her name was "party"
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
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