we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
