i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize
