I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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