if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
