he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
