The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
