If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize