omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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