carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
she told me i tasted like america
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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