Me. At least after what I've been through.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
