I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Buhtt sex?
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
