apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
