What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
