So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
