I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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