You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I just got carded by a ten year old.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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